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Saturday, January 31, 2015

I'll Show You How To Walk The Dog

Briskly! When it's 5F(ucking) degrees out. Foster dog is spoiled. When overnight or daytime temps are below 25F I let him inside. Which means taking him out every few hours to let him turn the snow yellow & brown and to remind him why I'm letting him stay inside when his testicles shrivel.

Doing this chore after drinking straight bourbon for 3 hours is some what of a challenge on the ice and snow. I've so far managed to stay on my feet, but I imagine it 's a AFV moment for any neighbors who may happen to peer out their windows at just the right moment.

On the weekend especially, I like to make the last bourbon ballet as late as possible to allow me the luxury of sleeping in before the morning excursion out in the frigid frontier.

I will be strongly recommending a return to rightful owner before the next season of sub-freezing temps. I prefer to remain inside myself on such cold nights. I'm too old for this shit.

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